Hello again friends and family,
I found myself not being able to sleep tonight, so I thought I would share some updates and thoughts that have been running through my mind.
To start, I have started a new job since quitting Old Navy in February this year. I'm now a part-timer at Boostability as a Content Implementation Specialist. I might be able to get a full time position soon, but I am not positive that will pan out right away. But my job, so far, has been a good break from retail. I currently help small businesses with creating new websites using WordPress. I have several tasks now, one being implementing what is written by a writer on my team onto WordPress. I have other duties I fulfill, but it would be too lengthy to go into.
Ryan has started school back up this spring. He is taking one official online course and is Skyping in for another class, which is a really generous option to give from Ryan's professor. But it's better than the alternative: having Ryan in Rexburg for three months, while I stay in Utah, working... not a real plan. Full time work and class is stressful for Ryan now, but hopefully he can put himself ahead of the game and succeed.
On a personal note, I have only told a few family members and friends, but Ryan and I are seriously trying to expand our family. I have been seeing a fertility doctor for a couple of months, with some, but not completely successful results. I would go into further detail, but it may be too much to disclose. (If you are really curious, I will be willing to divulge, privately.)
And this is kinda what led me to thinking about any future I will have with children I will care for. My first question that really struck me was: What kind of world will my child be living in? Well, think about it: there are a lot of terrible, confusing, and dangerous events going on and the human race seems to be on a slight slope in the wrong direction. Our country is struggling to hold together, many people fight to agree on many points, rumors of war and acts of terrorism,and family values and it's structure is being bombarded by those who struggle with gender identity and same-sex attraction. People are so focused on their mobile devices and computers that they miss out on normal conversation and can't enjoy life outside of a little screen. Social media has turned normally pleasant people into rage monsters whose opinion is the most dominant and right answer to everything. Morality is at risk. Lives are at stake with the threat of ISIS, the mislead feelings of people believing that most police officers are brutal and mindless murderers, and the stories that pop up almost daily of homicides and lethal armed robbery.
Point is, I could go on forever about what is plaguing our country alone and then add more about global problems. Question is, would my child be safe? Could I keep them safe? How could I protect them when the world falls deeper, and deeper into darkness and chaos?
Maybe I am worrying too much, which is a flaw I have, but seriously, I'm scared for those children I may bring into this world. We are taught to live in the world, but not be of it. My job as a mother isn't to overprotect, but to still guard them from evil and teach them the difference between good and evil. I want to share the Gospel message with them with the hope that they do not turn away from the truth and stay on the straight and narrow. I guess that is the basis of it. What much more could I do?
I still want this world to be a better environment than it is now. I wish I could have the power to change things, but I can only do so much. I guess praying that God will, in his Mercy, can help His children find peace and comfort and that ultimately that can lead people to remember Him.
Well, that wraps up my little message.
Thanks for taking the time to read my post.
With love,
Melissa
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